Friday, May 1, 2015

a prologue

The feeling is akin to waiting at the edge of an open airplane. Waiting to jump.

I stand, getting pumped-up to go, then sit, contemplating easing my way out. Like dropping into a pool with your legs already in the water. Even tho waiting has both abated and increased my anticipation, I know that regardless of sitting or standing-the moment I push off-everything changes. 

I know it's going to happen; I'm going to take the leap.

I am scared of the fall. 

My heart is beating loudly, but it simultaneously feels like it's on pause.
The sensation of weightlessness for a moment. 
Shock, suspension, exhilaration, relief - only for a moment. 

I'll either fly or fall. Hard.

I've tried to tell myself that either way I'll be fine. 
But, I know that's not truth. 
N o t h i n g    w i l l     b e   t h e   s a m e. 


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