When and how do you lose yourself?
Is it possible, if you feel you don't know why you are, that you never really owned your own identity? Instead, only an identity formed by your ancestors which you no longer fit into.
I realize to some this may sound like just a adolescent or young adult struggle of independence. But, I would argue it's deeper than that
I realize to some this may sound far too analytical.
And maybe it is
But, every human has to find meaning, belonging and an identity.
Even if they don't subscribe to a formal religious or societal institution to find it.
Without purpose, people quit their lives-figuratively and literally...
Knowing oneself is essential to building and maintaining your character and growing and sustaining healthy relationships.
I envy those who don't apologize for any aspect of themselves or feel the need to change for acceptance. I think we all confirm to some extent, but some are more prone than others.
I must note, acceptance is a fundamental human need. We all need and seek it out. But, the lengths to which some of us go to attain "acceptance" kills it's perfect form and makes it overrated...
For a long time, I felt like even tho I changed or held my tongue based on the people I was with for the sake of acceptance, I still knew who I was inside - what I really believed and desired. The true foundation.
Then, one day, I felt I lost that foundation. I couldn't answer truthfully and with conviction, "who am I?" Learning what's "socially desired" and having been knocked over by repeated disappointments so much so... That I really felt I had lost my identity. So many ambivalent feelings
It's an interesting, introspective exercise to ask yourself these questions one-at-a-time:
Who was I created to be? ie: I was born _______
Who was I conditioned to be? ie: I was raised to be ________
Who I am I allowing myself to be shaped into today? ie: the Influencers/mindsets/messages I am accepting shape me to be _______.
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